At the fall graduation ceremony Saturday morning, WKU President Gary Ransdell described himself as a “Lorax” and announced that he “speaks for the trees.”
Earlier in the semester, Western’s public relations officials announced the construction of WKU’s first LEED-certified, environmentally-friendly structure, the new College of Education building.
At graduation, Dr. Ransdell explained, “We’re doing something special here for the environment. Western will ‘build green’ for the sake of future generations of students, Brown Bar-ba-loots, and Swomee-Swans.”
According to the plans submitted to the U.S. Green Building Council, which bestows LEED certification, WKU plans to surround the new, green College of Ed. building with asphalt parking lots. “Nevertheless, not a single tuft of any silky, soft Truffula tree will be harmed” during the blacktopping process, claimed Dr. Ransdell.
The President concluded, “Western is committed to building in an environmentally conscious manner. No Thneed-sewing Once-ler’s going to divert Western from its green future.”
Graduates and their families had no idea what the hell Ransdell was talking about.
"LEED"? This whole time I thought they were saying "1337", with IRC terminals every 10 feet and a Gibson in the basement.
ReplyDeleteI generally have no idea what Ransdell is talking about. But then again, I don't think he does, either.
ReplyDeletePerhaps the President is laying the groundwork for a major in "Dr. Seuss Studies." I suspect that would be a popular one.
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